i have been taught since birth that a christian is to be different from an unbeliever. that sentence on the surface is easy to accept and it makes sense. let's go a little further. other than believing Jesus is God and that He died and rose again, a believer should be different. i then went to a very strict, conservative christian college where the clothes you wear, music you listen to, haircut you have, etc etc was a part of this "being different." i have been from one extreme to the other on where i stood on these issues. i am going to do my best to flesh out some of the observations i've made. i am by no means a Bible scholar or at the utmost point of my sanctification. i am simply trying to live the life that God asks of me.
it seems that today so many believers are trying to make christianity "cool." we want unbelievers to accept us. we want to blend in. we want to dress the same way, go to the same places, listen to the same music, watch the same movies. we want unbelievers to think we're "normal." now i will be the first to tell you that my convictions and standards on most of these issues are not at the level my dad (hi, daddy!) wishes they were. i will also admit that while i am where i want to be with some of these issues there are some where i am trying to do what i want under the guise of "it's not hurting anyone."
i, too, struggle with wanting to fit in. that usually manifests itself in my draw to pop culture and my clothes. but then i read this in the Bible and wonder what the cost of "fitting in" really is:
Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Matthew 5:11
wow, huh?! i know, sounds like a good time to me. not really! the thing is is that Jesus didn't promise us a good time. they hated Him, why wouldn't they hate us? we have just gotten really good at making Jesus just like the world that we don't often have too much persecution in our lives.
i am pretty sure i am not about to make friends with what i am going to talk about. but why do i have to keep it to myself? i am not saying i have all the answers - goodness knows i surely don't. this is just what i've been thinking about. let's talk about some specifics.
music - a touchy issue for sure. so i will be the first to tell you i listen to a bunch of different kinds of music. i honestly do not have a problem with secular music whose lyrics are not full of sexual perversion or profanity. i want to talk about the music we use specifically for worship. the church i attend uses only hymns and very traditional church music. i am totally fine with this. i am also fine with churches that incorporate some praise and worship. i love a good chorus. and chris tomlin and others have some of the most worshipful songs i have heard in quite a long time. deep, meaningful, worshipful lyrics that are not overpowered by the instruments. i came across a flyer for a Christian concert recently. i do not remember the exact wording but it was "Christian goth, punk and hardcore" bands. um....am i the only one that sees a problem here? we simply can not take music of the world, throw in a few Jesuses and call it worship music. i am by no means questioning the hearts of those that listen to this music. i am sure that there are many faithful believers that do. i am just saying that i don't think it makes much sense to unbelievers. the music we sing to our Savior should definitely be different than music the world uses for pleasure.
dress - should a believer dress any differently than an unbeliever? i would answer yes and no to this question. i love clothes! i like to shop for them, i like to mix and match them. i love jewelry and shoes. i like putting outfits together. i like to be current. i think all of this is perfectly acceptable for a believer. but there are some guidelines; some standards. we are to be living testimonies of Jesus Christ. we are His hands and feet. we are the only Jesus some people may ever see. if i walk into a social situation with all of my goods in plain view is this a good example of Jesus? am i drawing an unbeliever to me by my shining testimony or my shining tatas? is my skirt or shorts cut so high that the looks i'm getting aren't because i exude such peace and joy but because they are wondering what undergarments i was able to wear with my outfit? i want to draw others to Christ, not away from Him by aiding in their lustful thoughts. i know we don't like to think about this ladies, but if what i am wearing is revealing and a man looks at me and has an impure thought it isn't only his problem. and remember our bodies are not our own! they are foremost God's and secondly they are for our husbands (or future husbands) to enjoy. don't give the gift of your body to the world by showing it off in revealing clothes or bathing suits (don't get me started on swimwear!). we absolutely should be well kept and current but not revealing and sensuous. not all unbelievers dress seductively but what message are we sending to them when we don't cover up and yet say we are representatives of God's Kingdom?
entertainment - like television and movies. i am going to just put it out there; i used to watch sex and the city. i did not watch it on hbo (though i have seen it there) but on tbs. here was my rationalization, "sarah jessica parker is so cute and sweet. and i just love to see what the girls are wearing. and it is on tbs so it is edited." great, but the premise of the show is the sex lives of 4 SINGLE women. they have sex when they want with who they want and often not with the same who. as a believer who knows that God has clear guidelines about sex outside of marriage i had/have no business watching that show. i think we have become so desensitized by sex, violence, and profanity that we often have very low standards for our viewing entertainment. having a baby has really opened my eyes to what i am filling my mind with in the form of tv and movies. i have tried, and still not successfully, to not look at anything i wouldn't want my daughter to look at. we also are often quick to say no to sex but ok to violence. i would argue that neither are appealing to our Lord. if we are filling our minds with the same things the world is how can we reach them? i am not saying be oblivious to pop culture or what is out there. we should know what is going on but we don't have to be submerged in it.
alcohol - i almost didn't add this topic. it is oh so touchy! ok, there are those that believe the Bible is black and white on the subject. and there are those that believe it may be a bit gray. here is the conclusion i have come to after about 4 years of back and forth: i do not think the Bible says not to drink. it speaks very clearly about not being drunk. now, don't get ahead of me. i am not saying go party it up! while i believe this may fall under liberty there are other things we have to think about. when you order a drink at a restaurant or buy a bottle of wine at the grocery store does the waiter or cashier know that you don't drink to excess? do they know that Jesus Christ lives in your heart? you say, well, no but they don't know that if i just buy a box of cheez-its, either. you are right, they don't. but, whether it is right or not, unbelievers have certain preconceptions about believers and alcohol - they think we aren't supposed to do it. now if i was able to have a discussion with every unbeliever about Christian liberty and why i could have a glass of wine with my dinner and it not be sin it may be ok to partake. but i can't and those who see me drinking it would possibly draw their own conclusions. no, it isn't right, but it happens. now i have many, many dear friends who i respect as believers in Jesus Christ who do drink alcohol. while this is where i have come after my many years of digging around this topic it is not where they have landed. i still totally respect them and interact with them. and they with me. i refuse to break the bonds between believers over a topic like this. now, there are some (hi, dad!) who may have other thoughts about the right action to take. i respect that. i just don't think this issue is one to make or break a friendship and working together of believers.
the Bible tells us to come out from among them and be ye separate. it also tells us to be in the world but not of it. so i will end with this, can we go out among them and be separate? i think we absolutely can. and we must! no matter how we dress or what music we set to our message hearts will not be changed without the working of the Holy Spirit. God doesn't need us to make Him fashionable; our job is not to make Jesus cool to the masses - our job is simply to tell the masses about Him.
