see you next year!

i am leaving today to visit my family in pennsylvania. my parents don't have internet access (can you believe it?!) so i won't be checking in for about a week. i hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and a happy happy new year!

merry bleep

i remember in past years hearing people talk about not liking the phrase "happy holidays" and wanting to keep Christ in "Christ"mas, but this year i think i have heard it more than all previous years combined.

i am not sure why we as believers expect unbelievers to see the meaning of saying "merry christmas." i do understand why many choose to not use the word christmas when speaking to a large group or to a stranger - they want to recognize the various celebrations of this season - remember, they aren't believers.

and i have to admit that i am proud and so thankful to live in a country of religious freedom; a country where we are free to worship as we wish and to observe whatever celebrations are a part of the beliefs we choose. aren't Christians so often upset that tolerance is preached but not practiced toward them? i think that may be where this opposition to the simple phrase "happy holidays" comes from. christians feel that their beliefs are under attack. i feel like a kind "happy holidays" from someone is a recoginition of the various beliefs of their fellow citizens - their attempt to actually include all beliefs and not to exclude any. of course, my hope and prayer is that all would have their eyes opened to the truth of the Bible and the forgiveness found in the blood of Jesus, but i realize that not everyone will accept the truth. and because of this realization i am not offended or upset when someone wishes me a happy holiday.

i can not expect behavior, beliefs, or actions of a believer from an unbeliever. all i can do is live out and speak out when possible the truth of the saving grace of Jesus Christ. and i can kindly accept a greeting of "happy holidays" and offer a "merry christmas" to those i come across this time of year.

hark! the herald angels stress...

i am pretty sure the herald angels were singing and not stressing, but it is easy to forget about the singing this time of year. i haven't noticed it in past years so much, but this Christmas i find myself looking like this:


it started with the decorations - put the tree up, don't put the tree up; decorate only the living room, decorate any room with a surface to decorate; too many decorations, not enough decorations.

followed by the card - send a card, don't send a card; pay extra for a photo card, send a simple card; send a card to every person you have made eye contact with since kindergarten, send a card to family and close friends.

then came the shopping - so many people, so little money. it seems like there just isn't enough cash to buy decent gifts for everyone on our list.

and what is Christmas without decorations, cards, and gifts?! i think i need to take a breath. i need to remember that Christmas isn't about any one of those things. and while i know that Christmas is the time of year i can reflect on the birth of my Savior, that great Gift gets lost and nearly forgotten under all the envelope addressing and gift wrapping. i spend more evenings lamenting all that is still left to do and buy and no time praising the Baby born to save my soul.

i don't believe that anything is inheritantly wrong with decorating your home or giving a gift. however, if the meaning of Christmas is an afterthought, an excuse to buy and receive, there is a problem.

Jesus was born so that we may receive a gift not found in stores; a gift that would not be forgotten before the next December 25th rolls around; a gift that relieves stress, not causes it; maybe next year we will forgo all of the commercial/consumerist pomp and circumstance and use the season to be thankful for and to share the best gift ever given - eternal life through the blood of Jesus Christ.

may we remember the young mother cradling her newborn Son - her Son sent to be the Savior of the world.

"Kissing the Face of God" by Morgan Weistling

our christmas home

boy, i haven't been around here much lately. and i am super late for the nester's christmas tour of homes. but better late than never, right??? my decorations are pretty minimal this year with a newly cruising/just about walking, into everything and everything into her mouth 11 month old!

so without further ado - welcome to my christmas home!

our front door

a close up of the wreath. i made this about 3 years ago and it has really held up well!

the mat right inside the door.

the hallway as you enter

a "gift" my husband's grandmother made - i leave it out year round because it matches my kitchen.

this mirror is over our couch. i got the wreath at target for $2.50 and hot glued the ornaments on.

i usually use this glass bead garland on our tree. but this year we opted not to put the big tree up because of buggie's uncontrollable curiosity and mama's need for sanity! so i filled up the bottom of this hurricane vase with the garland.

a nativity ornament that is usually on our tree found a nice home on this decorative jar on a bookcase in the living room.

our bitty 18 inch tree. it will find a new home in buggie's room or in the kitchen next Christmas.

our stockings hung over the television. i found the stocking holders a couple years ago at the dollar store! i bought 4 of them with dreams of two little ones to fill the others one day. i was so happy to hang buggie's stocking on one of those hooks!

my favorite Christmas decoration - my nativity. i just love this! the crosses hang here year round. i thought the imagery of the Baby Jesus under the cross was pretty touching and a great reminder of why Jesus was born in the first place. this picture does not do this justice!

thank you for stopping by my place! after your visit to my home jump over to the nesting place and take a look around some really lovely decorated homes that often cause me to be envious, but in a nice Christlike way (is that possible? ha!)!

slacker

have i been a big ol' blogging slacker, or what? you miss one day and it is so easy to miss another...and another. i am really going to have to get back to my daily blogging habits.

i realized that i never posted a picture from buggie's first thanksgiving. there are a few pretty cute ones of my little sweetie enjoying turkey and butter beans but i will just leave you with this one. hoping to see you back around here tomorrow!

thumbs up thursday

i do not want to make God's Word trivial or fluffy by saying i give it a thumbs up, but today i can think of absolutely nothing better in this life or the next than God's saving grace. and a simple thumbs up will never be enough to express how truly rich these words are to me:

I Corinthians 6:9-11

Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. BUT you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

fore!

i do not personally know tiger woods. i am not a golf fan. even so, i have somewhere along the way developed an idea of who i thought tiger woods was/is. i have seen interviews he has given. i have heard others talk about him. he seemed to me to be a nice guy, a hard worker. i know that many consider him a master athlete. he is regarded as a role model to many. then his car hits a tree and his life hits the fan.

women claiming to have had immoral relationships with tiger are speaking out left and right. various media outlets are covering woods' infidelity as if all wars are over and this is the biggest news around. i can't shake thoughts about this man's wife and children, about this man's eternal soul.

i am disappointed by tiger's infidelities. of course! i have yet to figure out why men stray from their wives. my heart aches for tiger's wife. the pain she must be feeling. the feelings of doubt she must have about herself and if this is her fault. i hurt for their children. this situation is hard enough on children of "regular" parents let alone on children of celebrity parents. and my heart is a bit tender toward tiger himself. hold on! don't get upset that i am not bashing him. i will explain.

tiger woods is human. what he has done is absolutely, without any doubt wrong. but we can not put all hope and faith in a human being. we will always be disappointed. the flesh will always fail us. there is but One that we should put on a pedestal - Jesus Christ. this is not the first time a public figure, a "role model" has transgressed and proven himself to be less than what we have thought. i am not trying to excuse tiger's actions and behavior, but i am trying to say that further humiliating him or dragging out more and more dirt about his relationships will do no good.

i would argue that we need to view tiger woods as a man that is in need of a personal relationship with Jesus. how do i know he doesn't have one? i don't. only God knows our hearts. based on what has been going on in his life, though, i would say if he does know Jesus he isn't walking very closely to Him right now. can we not see him as a broken man who makes mistakes but who was created for so much more?

we are pretty fortunate. when we fail it is between us, those we've failed, and the Lord. unfortunately, his failures are not simply between himself, his family, and God. due to his public status tiger's failures are between the world as well. i dare say this is none of our business. any negative talk, inappropriate text messages, private voicemails, etc being swirled around in the media isn't only hurting tiger woods. how is the public knowing every single detail going to help a broken marriage, hurting children, and other players in this situation?

my disappointment is not only targeted at tiger's infidelity - it is extended to these women who are revealing the information. are these women proud of having an affair with a married father of 2? is their lust for money and celebrity so overwhelming that they don't care who they hurt on their quest? these women, too, are broken and in need of the only One that will fulfill all of their desires. flings with celebrities, 15 minutes of fame, and money will never fill the hearts of these women. they are searching for something, whether they would admit that or not. the media is no better when it comes to these women. the media is simply using them - they don't care who these women are or what their stories or hurts or joys are - the media wants a story and they will use these women for just that.

it would be easy to bash tiger woods for cheating on his wife. it may even be tempting to do so. but wouldn't it take more character to pray for this man and his hurting family - to see this man as a child of God who needs Him - to forgive his indiscretions and hope that he is able to heal and rebuild his marriage and relationship with his children? wouldn't our pursuing of Christlikeness be stretched if we prayed for the women involved in these affairs? if we prayed that the Lord opens their eyes to His love and His gift to them in Jesus? if we prayed that these women recognize their worth and beauty in the Kingdom and not just as sex objects for men to use when they feel like it? i do pray that God will use these horrible circumstances in the woods' household to make Himself known to them. that the Lord will make Himself known to the women involved. that all glory will go to the Father and that hearts and lives will be restored.

why are mondays so yucky?

it has been one of those days. honey bear is back to work after a long weekend and bug is in the midst of a teething frenzy. my sweet girl woke up a bit crabby and has remained that way unless she is eating.

here is my question - my plea - how do you start and implement discipline? my day is full of "no, bug" and "bug, don't touch that." she knows when i say "no" that she isn't supposed to be doing whatever it is that she's doing because she stops, looks at me, and then has a breakdown. this is how the entire day proceeds - i say no, she has a meltdown, then she tries again, repeat.

until this point i have had the absolute sweetest baby. and she still is so sweet, only now the sweetness is occasionally interrupted by crazy, i want my way, screaming baby. i am really just not sure what to do. how do you start discipline with an 11 month old? how do you enforce rules? what do you do when there is a breakdown? how do i explain the discipline when i'm not sure she understands? i need a book! or your advice!

jesus loves mean people too

whenever we go out i usually (not absolutely 100% of the time) make sure bug is donning a hairbow. i just love them on her. and, afterall, she is my little girl!

bug and i and one of her many hairbows!

so today was no different. we went to dinner with her nana, papa, and her aunt a and then to target and bug's outfit was complete with a hairbow. she really does not mind them one bit. the only time she ever pulls at the hairbow is when she is really sleepy. other than that those bows stay on all day and, no, we never have a fight when putting them on. i would say 99.9% of the time we hear ooos and ahhhs and "she is so cute" and "look at that hairbow" from people we come across. today, though, we had our first not so friendly reaction.

while in target a woman walked by us, looked directly at bug, very audibly and with great disdain said "ugh, poor kid" and continued walking by. i, of course, couldn't let that go and said, "my child is very happy." she, indeed, was very happy - cooing and laughing and playing with her aunt a. i can't be for certain why this woman said this but i drew the conclusion that the hairbow was the culprit. i would so love to say that i was oh so very Christlike towards this woman, but i cannot tell a lie. i immediately began pointing out all physical things about her that were unbecoming: her 3 shades of blue hair, her tshirt that was inside out, her overall obnoxious demeanor. is she obnoxious? i really can't say - my anger was talking.

as i've been able to step back from this for a bit i realize that i was no better than this woman. and she, if truth be told, really did nothing wrong. so she doesn't like bug's hairbow - big deal! i took her comment as an attack on my parenting. my parenting is no better or worse due to her comment. but my heart and attitude could've responded in a much better way. i am pretty positive that the Lord was not pleased with my glaring at this woman or with my negative comments toward her even if she didn't hear them. i gave not a fleeting thought to this woman's eternal person and focused solely on how she had hurt me and how she was way worse off than my sweet daughter wearing a hairbow. truth is, she may just be worse off - she may not know Jesus as her Savior. i look back now and wonder if i could've used the few seconds i tried to assure her of bug's happiness to say something of more eternal value. i wonder how things would've been different if i had looked past her personal preferences that i do not share (ie blue hair) and tried to see her as someone my Savior loves and calls for me to love.

i am ashamed that i cannot walk the walk of Jesus when it matters. i am really good at talking about it but when it matters my flesh seems to always win out. i hope next time i can hear with Jesus' ears and see with His eyes.

*and this has absolutely nothing to do with this post but i just wanted to say how H.O.T. my husband is* (that's for you, baby! love you so much!)*

i am 25 and holding

i just got an email today about my...ahem...10 year high school class reunion. i was certain that i was emailed by mistake. i checked the sender's name again and my name again. ok, they meant to send it to me. so surely someone miscounted. there is no way i should be receiving information about a 10 year high school reunion. that is just crazy since i just graduated last year!

where oh where does the time go? i remember high school like it was yesterday. i don't feel a day over 15. but then i look around and realize i live 500 miles away from my parents, i have a husband, a baby, and i was a teacher myself for 3 years. i guess 10 years has gone by.

my best friends who was born the day before me, and yes, we have known each other as long, said not too long ago that she is 25. i quickly reminded her that we are indeed 27. she corrected me, "no, i am 25 and holding." of course! now i get it. me, too!

teeth trees and pulling up

oh, goodness, bug just keeps teething! once those little buggers break through we are fine, but waiting for that to happen may just drive me mad! buggie was just miserable today. every morning i walk into her room to a happily cooing and smiling little girl. this morning i walked in to screaming fit for a horror movie. and it didn't end when i picked her up. she went on this way until about 3:30 when i took a look around her mouth, saw that little area of gums that was translucent looking and bulging, gave her some tylenol, and finally rocked/coaxed her to sleep. she slept for 2 hours and woke up in pretty good spirits. i felt her gums and sure enough that little tooth had broken through. glory! hopefully tomorrow is a tooth free day...

this will be bug's first christmas. i am really looking forward to seeing her in her christmas jammies and ripping open packages. i have had grand pictures in my head of us photographing our little sweetie in her christmas dress in front of the tree. but i don't think those reveries will come true this year. see, our little one is pulling up and cruising around - and still putting everything she finds into her mouth. i am not so keen on putting the tree up this year. it is already a full day's work keeping her out of our general decorations - i can't imagine keeping her out of the tree and keeping the tree out of her mouth! so as much as i hate the idea of not having our tree up i really think my sanity will thank me in the long run. fortunately we will be spending christmas day at my parents' house where their tree will be up and twinkling so it won't be a completely tree free christmas.

i feel like these teething, learning to walk, eating anything that fits into her mouth days are really long sometimes. but then i think of her having all of her teeth, walking to the school bus, and being pretty picky about what goes into her mouth and i miss my baby.

nothing in particular and everything on my mind

i wasn't really sure what to write about tonight so i guess i'll just do a little rambling. =) can we talk about how crazy a day can be with a little one who crawls all over the place and is now pulling herself up on anything she can put her hands on?! i feel like most of my day is spent telling bug "stay away from there" and "don't touch that." and i am pretty sure i never sit. i am trying to see the bright side - never sitting has got to equal some calories burned!

so i have missed my quiet time with Jesus two days in a row. it makes such a difference to your day. i think i will do some Bible reading before bed tonight. i really like to do it first thing in the morning, but the past two mornings both bug and i have slept in. the extra sleep has been nice but i really miss the extra time with Jesus. i MUST get back on track! i've been thinking about incorporating some singing into my time. i really love singing praise to the Lord and why not do it during my devotions? do you use music for your quiet time? do you use a devotional book? i am always interested in knowing what works for everyone. i don't really have a set thing i do. right now i read a devotional and then follow the schedule for reading the Bible through in a year. i like getting an old and new testament passage and a psalm in. do you have any recommendations for devotional books?

my sweet honey bear didn't get home from work until 9pm tonight! oh, i missed him! i had gone ahead and fed bug dinner before he got home and she went down for the night as he was walking in. the two of us had hamburgers and fries from take out for dinner. it was yummy and i am simply ignoring the lack of health benefits in the meal. we are both sitting on the couch now and winding down for the night.

i will spare you any more mundane details of my day. i will leave you, however with another song by casting crowns on their new cd until the whole world hears. i am just really loving this cd right now!

thumbs up thursday

i love casting crowns! i have enjoyed their music for quite a while. the lyrics are just so good. that sounds hokey but honestly their lyrics are so great. i talked about another of their songs here.



this past tuesday casting crowns' newest cd until the whole world hears came out. my sweet mother in love had preordered copies for me and my sister in love. i have been listening to it since i got it from her yesterday. again, so good! my favorite song is track 11, blessed redeemer. the song with the lyrics is in a youtube video at the end of this post. hope you enjoy it as much as i do.

so, thumbs up thursday this week goes to casting crowns!

sorry this was so rushed! my sister in love and i have a midnight date with a sparkly friend of ours! =) do any of you know our friend?

a post by Bug's Mimi

God, I want to do great things for you,
And speak to all the nations!
God replies:
That's well and good,
But for now
Fix your children's complications.
Lord, I want to straighten up the world,
Feed the hungry and fulfill someones wishes!
God says:
Fine, but for the present,
You need to wash the dishes.
Lord, I want to preach, proclaim your name
And bring salvation to the earth!
God says:
Good! Then teach your children
And preach my name to those you've given birth.
At the end of the day,
I think of all I've done.
But as I look it seems,
I've accomplished nothing for the Son!
God, I had no time to witness one on one,
I couldn't join my church group,
They said I missed out on lots of fun.
My household is the only thing
That managed to be cleaned,
My neighbor is the only one,
Besides my family I could feed.
The only ones I've ready Your Word
Are those within my home.
God I've done so very little
And I feel so all alone!
God says:
I've seen the way you cleaned and cooked
And taught your kids My name.
Tomorrow morning at eight o'clock,
I'll watch you do the same.
The work you do at home,
Though no one really sees,
Is helping to raise little ones
To grow and worship me.
My ways are not your ways,
I don't expect you yet to see,
But the precepts that you've taught your children,
Will help others bow the knee.
Your children will reach out to others,
Your example in their mind.
They'll do great work for Me
And their children will respond in kind.
The hand that rules the world,
Also rocks the cradle.
Because of you, your children love Me,
All their hearts are stable.
Though your house is your domain,
Your tasks seem rather plain,
Your efforts will reach the multitudes,
Though from humble work they came.

-author unknown

Sometimes the day to day toiling in the home seems so pointless, unglamorous, and very much mundane, but then I remember the words that Jesus spoke in Matthew 25:35-46. He spoke about being naked and you clothed Me, I was hungry and you fed Me, I was a stranger and you took Me in. The disciples asked "When, Lord, did we do these things?" And He said that if you do it to the "least of these" you do it for Me. When we bring that little stranger into the world, put him to the breast, change his diapers and dress him up snug....we are doing that for HIM! Our once humble home has become a temple in which to worship our Lord. We are giving praise and glory to Him simply by caring for the ones He has placed into our lives. What an awesome thing to be working together with the Most High God to raise these children!

come out, come out wherever you are!

yes, i have been m.i.a. for a while. i don't know what happened. for a while there it seemed like we had plans every night of the week and by the time i would get home blogging was the last thing on my mind. but i knew, as the governor of california has been known to say, i'd be back!

this week i have started implementing a new routine. not for bug but for me. i have always been a night owl. i love to stay up late and sleep in late. when i had a baby i was concerned that my sleeping in would be no more. thankfully i have been blessed with a little one who sleeps until 9 or 9:30. by the time i get my day started and tend to all of bug's unending needs i find that it is midnight and i have made no quiet time for the Lord. so last night i went to bed a bit earlier than usual and i got up this morning when my husband got up to get ready for work.

i spent the hour or so before bug awoke reading my Bible, reading a little devotional, and praying. i can't tell you what a difference this made to my day!!! all day i had the thoughts from my morning reading running through my head. it was like a reminder of why i had a day at all. i found myself considerably less on edge and stressed. i did several household chores without loathing them. and i played on the floor with my sweet girl happily instead of feeling like i was simply filling time. my thoughts were far more often on heavenly things today than usual.

i want to leave you with a quote from my reading from this morning.

jonathan edwards said, "'the godly are designed for unknown and inconceivable happiness.' in other words, the certainty and greatness of the happiness of God's people is as sure as God's zeal for his own glory."

how could i not have a good day after reading that? and this:

I will make with them an everlasting covenant, that I will not turn away from doing good to them. And I will put the fear of me in their hearts, that they may not turn from me. I will rejoice in doing them good, and I will plant them in this land in faithfulness, with all my heart and all my soul. jeremiah 32:30-41

a little side note, tomorrow i will be sharing with you a post written by a very special guest blogger - my bug's mimi!!! it's a good one so be sure to check it out.

thumbs up thursday

i am feeling a bit guilty tonight. were you hoping for a new emotion? sorry. anyway, feeling some guilt. i think i may have rushed bedtime tonight.

the clock said 7:40, bug said in not so many words that she was sleepy, and i said i am ready to be done for the day. so honey bear offered to change our sweet girl into her jammies. i should've come to her room right after for a story, Bible time, and a song but instead i just yelled in, "nite nite, buggie. i love you," and honey bear put her down. now she was out in less than 60 seconds of her head hitting the...she doesn't use a pillow, but you get the idea, so i know without a doubt that she was exhausted. i just feel bad because all i could think about was this (yes, those are my tootsies):


it has been a long day. nothing out of the ordinary, i am just feeling especially worn down. so i am now lounging in my bubble bath thinking about how nice it is to just be danielle for a bit and not mommy. being mommy is so great but just being danielle comes with a lot less demands. so i will rest tonight and wake up ready to be bug's mom 100% in the morning.

until then i give a thumbs up to bedtime! (and blogging in the bathtub even though my husband is none too thrilled about my computer being so close to water)

to my husband's sister

dear sister in love,

you know that i loved your brother from, literally, the moment i first met him. at that point my heart was his. so when i found out he had a sister i added another sister to the many i already have. you were his and now you were mine, too.

i know that before we moved closer to you we didn't talk that often. i think it was a little she's his sister/she's his wife so we'll be nice kind of relationship. we probably haven't always seen eye to eye, but over this past year i have been able to actually get to know you. so you being my sister because you're my husband's sister has changed to you being my sister because i love you. i have just the greatest time with you when we spend wednesdays and fridays driving our husbands mad with our unending shopping. i never feel pressed for conversation when i'm with you - probably because if i don't have anything to say there is no doubt that you will! i love how much you love my buggie. she is my number one girl and i think you may love her just as much as i do...well, maybe not as much as i do...a special love is formed when you push someone out of your body, but you get my drift. and i thank you for sharing your mom and dad with me. it isn't the easiest thing being so far from my parents and your parents have really filled some of my loneliness for my own. my family, my sisters and my best friends all live so far away - but now i know that i have a dear sweet friend and sister just 5 minutes away.

i know that you are feeling a bit stressed and scared with things that are happening in your life right now. i also know that you know the One who holds all the plans. i don't have the answers or peace our Heavenly Father can give you, but i can offer you an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, and a hug when you need it. i love you with my whole heart.

me and my big head, buggie, my sister in love

let me check my schedule

i have always been a person that works better with a list. to accomplish anything in a timely and organized manner i need to write it down. i make lists for packing, for projects, for shopping. when i was in college i always felt like i was accomplishing more when i was able to mark things off of my list.


being a stay at home mom is all new to me. i figured i would have housework and baby to care for and how hard could it be? however, most days i find myself running over in my head all of the things i should/could be doing - clean the bathrooms. fold the laundry, unload the dishwasher, vacuum, go through bug's clothes, hang pictures, take out the garbage, mop the kitchen floor, etc etc - and instead of doing them i get overwhelmed with the ongoing list and beat myself up over how much i'm not getting done. i make it to the end of the day having finished maybe one task and dreading the morning when i will face the ever growing list again and my inadequacies as a stay at home mom/wife.

i approached honey bear about how this is affecting not only how our home looks but also how i feel in my role as wife and mother. we have come up with a plan that i think will do some amazing things around here! each saturday i am going to take 2 or so hours to myself. i can go to a bookstore, coffee shop, the park, even just sit in the car if i like. during this time i am going to make lists - lists of cleaning i'd like to take on and assign it to a day (ie bathrooms on monday, bug's room on tuesday, etc), lists of menus, lists for the grocery store, lists of errands assigned to a day. i will be able to follow a daily list of chores, errands, and projects and cross them off as i complete them. not only will i be able to mark things off but i will be tackling things on a day by day basis instead of a never ending, seemingly insurmountable mountain of need-to-dos.

when my lists are finished, i can do some things just by myself. my alone time only happens when i need to use the bathroom and then only if honey bear is home to keep an eye on bug while i go. i never understood the energy boost some people will get from some alone time, but since not being alone for the past 10 months i think i am understanding it a bit more. it is nice to sometimes be alone with your own thoughts - for just a bit. i am hoping to listen to music, read my Bible, do a little mindless shopping, and maybe even some reading from the growing stack of books on my nightstand.

i really feel like this is a plan that will not only help me get things done around here but will help me be more content. don't get me wrong, i am not unhappy - i have the best husband in the world and a beautiful little girl. but letting my daily tasks overwhelm me allows the enemy to invade my thoughts. he will use any moment of stress to make me doubt my worthiness. my discontent with my lack of accomplishment in my home rubs off on my relationship with my husband and on my interaction with my baby. it is time to stand up and fight back - list in hand and all prayed up!

do you have a getaway that works for you during the week? how do you keep the housework and mommy duties in check without feeling overwhelmed?

thumbs up thursday

my darling daughter l.o.v.e.s her big girl food! and i really enjoy watching her eat. it is just too cute. however, along with both of our enjoyment also comes mushed cheese in the carpet and runaway peas on the floor. the issue is compounded by the fact that we are in an apartment that is carpeted wall to wall. so i find myself dragging my beloved vacuum out about 3 times a day. ugh...vacuuming is definitely not my favorite past time.



i am sure that i am not the first one to think of this idea i am about to share, but i'll tell ya, it has been such a big help! i decided to find one of those plastic, flannel backed tablecloths to put under bug's highchair while she eats. then when she is finished i just roll the tablecloth up and shake it out either outside or over the garbage can. this solution has cut down my bonding time with the vacuum but i'll get over it!

btw, i have had the idea to put the tablecloth under the highchair for a couple of weeks, but the only tablecloths i could find were $5 or more and not very cute. i mean, the girl has to have a cute tablecloth under her. i was at the dollar store yesterday for gift wrapping materials and just happened to see some plastic tablecloths. i was set on getting a round one and from where i was standing i could only make out one tablecloth that looked cute. i figured the chances of it being cute and round and only a dollar were slim to none - i was wrong! it is round, and, if i may say so, pretty adorable.

to my vacuum

dear cute red vacuum,

i realize that over the last three years i have oft neglected you leaving you in the hall closet for days, often weeks, on end without so much as a quick run around the living room. i have not forgotten all the great attachments that you have to offer and how lovely you can really make all of my rooms.

you see, it is just that over the past few years it has just been me and honey bear. the carpets could use a go over every now and again, but in my laid back cleaning style it just wasn't necessary to bring you out that often. surely you knew this day would come. the day when we would have a crawling nine month old who is able to spot the tiniest of crumb or paper or outdoor debris and promptly put it in her mouth.

so i am coming to you today, my dear vacuum, asking you to forgive my past neglect and to partner with me in an effort to suck up all of this gunck! perhaps it is you giving me the cold shoulder for visiting you so infrequently, but when i stop by every other day (sometimes every day) to free you from the hall closet and attack the carpets you just aren't performing in the way necessary. the carpets still harbor small bits of...stuff that the baby manages to find and eat.

in my effort to make amends i am willing to fit you with a new filter this afternoon. i hope that you will accept my gift and forgive me for my past grievances. let's work together to keep yuck out of the baby's mouth and to keep my sanity intact.

i do indeed care greatly for you, vacuum. thank you for accepting my letter. from here on out, let's be the best of pals!

sincerely,
bug's mom

pray pray pray

little stellan - mckmama's sweet almost one year old boy - was admitted to the picu last night. go to mckmama's blog for all the details and updates. most importantly, PRAY for baby stellan! and for his mommy and daddy.

mckmama.com

jesus is my homeboy?

i have been taught since birth that a christian is to be different from an unbeliever. that sentence on the surface is easy to accept and it makes sense. let's go a little further. other than believing Jesus is God and that He died and rose again, a believer should be different. i then went to a very strict, conservative christian college where the clothes you wear, music you listen to, haircut you have, etc etc was a part of this "being different." i have been from one extreme to the other on where i stood on these issues. i am going to do my best to flesh out some of the observations i've made. i am by no means a Bible scholar or at the utmost point of my sanctification. i am simply trying to live the life that God asks of me.

it seems that today so many believers are trying to make christianity "cool." we want unbelievers to accept us. we want to blend in. we want to dress the same way, go to the same places, listen to the same music, watch the same movies. we want unbelievers to think we're "normal." now i will be the first to tell you that my convictions and standards on most of these issues are not at the level my dad (hi, daddy!) wishes they were. i will also admit that while i am where i want to be with some of these issues there are some where i am trying to do what i want under the guise of "it's not hurting anyone."

i, too, struggle with wanting to fit in. that usually manifests itself in my draw to pop culture and my clothes. but then i read this in the Bible and wonder what the cost of "fitting in" really is:

Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Matthew 5:11

wow, huh?! i know, sounds like a good time to me. not really! the thing is is that Jesus didn't promise us a good time. they hated Him, why wouldn't they hate us? we have just gotten really good at making Jesus just like the world that we don't often have too much persecution in our lives.

i am pretty sure i am not about to make friends with what i am going to talk about. but why do i have to keep it to myself? i am not saying i have all the answers - goodness knows i surely don't. this is just what i've been thinking about. let's talk about some specifics.

music - a touchy issue for sure. so i will be the first to tell you i listen to a bunch of different kinds of music. i honestly do not have a problem with secular music whose lyrics are not full of sexual perversion or profanity. i want to talk about the music we use specifically for worship. the church i attend uses only hymns and very traditional church music. i am totally fine with this. i am also fine with churches that incorporate some praise and worship. i love a good chorus. and chris tomlin and others have some of the most worshipful songs i have heard in quite a long time. deep, meaningful, worshipful lyrics that are not overpowered by the instruments. i came across a flyer for a Christian concert recently. i do not remember the exact wording but it was "Christian goth, punk and hardcore" bands. um....am i the only one that sees a problem here? we simply can not take music of the world, throw in a few Jesuses and call it worship music. i am by no means questioning the hearts of those that listen to this music. i am sure that there are many faithful believers that do. i am just saying that i don't think it makes much sense to unbelievers. the music we sing to our Savior should definitely be different than music the world uses for pleasure.

dress - should a believer dress any differently than an unbeliever? i would answer yes and no to this question. i love clothes! i like to shop for them, i like to mix and match them. i love jewelry and shoes. i like putting outfits together. i like to be current. i think all of this is perfectly acceptable for a believer. but there are some guidelines; some standards. we are to be living testimonies of Jesus Christ. we are His hands and feet. we are the only Jesus some people may ever see. if i walk into a social situation with all of my goods in plain view is this a good example of Jesus? am i drawing an unbeliever to me by my shining testimony or my shining tatas? is my skirt or shorts cut so high that the looks i'm getting aren't because i exude such peace and joy but because they are wondering what undergarments i was able to wear with my outfit? i want to draw others to Christ, not away from Him by aiding in their lustful thoughts. i know we don't like to think about this ladies, but if what i am wearing is revealing and a man looks at me and has an impure thought it isn't only his problem. and remember our bodies are not our own! they are foremost God's and secondly they are for our husbands (or future husbands) to enjoy. don't give the gift of your body to the world by showing it off in revealing clothes or bathing suits (don't get me started on swimwear!). we absolutely should be well kept and current but not revealing and sensuous. not all unbelievers dress seductively but what message are we sending to them when we don't cover up and yet say we are representatives of God's Kingdom?

entertainment - like television and movies. i am going to just put it out there; i used to watch sex and the city. i did not watch it on hbo (though i have seen it there) but on tbs. here was my rationalization, "sarah jessica parker is so cute and sweet. and i just love to see what the girls are wearing. and it is on tbs so it is edited." great, but the premise of the show is the sex lives of 4 SINGLE women. they have sex when they want with who they want and often not with the same who. as a believer who knows that God has clear guidelines about sex outside of marriage i had/have no business watching that show. i think we have become so desensitized by sex, violence, and profanity that we often have very low standards for our viewing entertainment. having a baby has really opened my eyes to what i am filling my mind with in the form of tv and movies. i have tried, and still not successfully, to not look at anything i wouldn't want my daughter to look at. we also are often quick to say no to sex but ok to violence. i would argue that neither are appealing to our Lord. if we are filling our minds with the same things the world is how can we reach them? i am not saying be oblivious to pop culture or what is out there. we should know what is going on but we don't have to be submerged in it.

alcohol - i almost didn't add this topic. it is oh so touchy! ok, there are those that believe the Bible is black and white on the subject. and there are those that believe it may be a bit gray. here is the conclusion i have come to after about 4 years of back and forth: i do not think the Bible says not to drink. it speaks very clearly about not being drunk. now, don't get ahead of me. i am not saying go party it up! while i believe this may fall under liberty there are other things we have to think about. when you order a drink at a restaurant or buy a bottle of wine at the grocery store does the waiter or cashier know that you don't drink to excess? do they know that Jesus Christ lives in your heart? you say, well, no but they don't know that if i just buy a box of cheez-its, either. you are right, they don't. but, whether it is right or not, unbelievers have certain preconceptions about believers and alcohol - they think we aren't supposed to do it. now if i was able to have a discussion with every unbeliever about Christian liberty and why i could have a glass of wine with my dinner and it not be sin it may be ok to partake. but i can't and those who see me drinking it would possibly draw their own conclusions. no, it isn't right, but it happens. now i have many, many dear friends who i respect as believers in Jesus Christ who do drink alcohol. while this is where i have come after my many years of digging around this topic it is not where they have landed. i still totally respect them and interact with them. and they with me. i refuse to break the bonds between believers over a topic like this. now, there are some (hi, dad!) who may have other thoughts about the right action to take. i respect that. i just don't think this issue is one to make or break a friendship and working together of believers.

the Bible tells us to come out from among them and be ye separate. it also tells us to be in the world but not of it. so i will end with this, can we go out among them and be separate? i think we absolutely can. and we must! no matter how we dress or what music we set to our message hearts will not be changed without the working of the Holy Spirit. God doesn't need us to make Him fashionable; our job is not to make Jesus cool to the masses - our job is simply to tell the masses about Him.

i didn't really love it that much

there is a whole new phase of life going on here at our house. my sweet, content to lay on her tummy time mat, gentle 9 month old bug has found her legs. and by found her legs i mean she has found that her legs can get her places - far far away places where forbidden treasures lie.

i don't think i have ever been too particular about my "things." i mean, i like to keep the things i have nice and somewhat orderly, but i do know that they are just "things." i am sure that my dad is probably rolling his eyes if (and he better be) he's reading this. i have grown up with many small sisters. i lived in a dorm room with 3 other girls. i know that things get broken. but for the past 5 years i have been living with only one other adult (the last 3 with my husband). my stuff has always been safe. now if you are a decoration or picture beware of attack!

today bug made her way from her little play spot all the way across the living room to where this bookshelf is housed:

i love this bookshelf and all the things on it. bug feels the same way. she made super friends with this little treasure:

after loving on her, bug promptly tossed her to the middle of the room. did my sweet baby not know that this figurine is a dear remembrance of the time she spent in my tummy? she either didn't know or didn't care because after she tossed it she went on to crawl into some more trouble.

fortunately, nothing was broken today. i think i need to read that section in my parenting book about baby proofing now! and if (or when) something is broken it will be ok - i don't really love it all that much anyway - definitely not as much as i love this sweetie bug!!!

thumbs up thursday

i have long wanted to be jewish.

i am aware that this opening declaration most likely sounds absurd. but it is true. i have always been fascinated by judaism. the traditions, the yiddish, the chosen. of course, i do absolutely beyond a shadow of a doubt believe that Jesus Christ is the Messiah. that puts a bit of a damper on any conversion dreams. there is just something about this group of people that God Himself chose to be His people. the community His only Son was born into.

in college i happened upon a book in the local library. in all honesty i was drawn to it by the cover, though i can't remember now what the cover even looked like. i took the book back to my dorm room and simply gulped it up. i couldn't put it down. i kept it out several weeks past its due date. that book is today my thumbs up thursday.

girl meets God by lauren winner

lauren was born into a home of a jewish father and southern baptist mother. her parents divorced. lauren was not technically jewish because it is passed through the mother. so she converted to judaism. then in college lauren converted to christianity. this book is the story of her journey. i can not say enough about this great memoir. not only is the story so good but lauren is such a great writer. i have since bought and read her other two books: mudhouse sabbath (SOOO good) and real sex - the naked truth about chastity. i recommend them all! lauren discusses how judaism and christianity are not mutually exclusive of each other. she discusses the jewish traditions she still keeps.

i really encourage you to pick up girl meets God. i get goosebumps whenever a chosen one of God has their eyes opened to the truth of the already come Messiah. really beautiful!

is there a book you hold dear? share it with us!

that time again

this is the time of the week to share all the things you didn't do and realize you're not the only one! after checking out what i so didn't do this past week, head over to mckmama's blog and share your not me's!

i like taking care of the laundry as soon as i see it. pile in the wash and immediately in the dryer. so i absolutely did not leave a load of towels in the washing machine for a week before i noticed the horrible smell of mildew and had to wash the load two more times. not me, i would never do that!

i would never send my best friend a text message in the middle of church because i had an idea and wanted to tell her before i forgot. cell phone etiquette is a pet peeve of mine! not me.

my husband's 29th birthday is not coming up and i did not book a night in a hotel so we could get away all alone for the first time in 9 months while the baby stayed with her nana and papa. i surely couldn't leave my bug for a whole night and i wouldn't have such a wonderful wonderful time with my handsome love - not me!

what did you not do last week?

busy busy

this coming tuesday is honey bear's 29th birthday. he assures me this isn't a big deal, but i feel that the last birthday in your twenties is to be celebrated BIG! so i am busy preparing several surprises for my handsome almost 29 year old groom for this evening. i will share those surprises with all of you after they have been revealed to him, of course. so, this is my last post until monday.

thought i would leave you with a laugh (and some truth!). have a great weekend!

thumbs up thursday

i know that i told you last thursday that i would be doing a giveaway for this thumbs up thursday. unfortunately i am going to have to hold off on that this week. i am hoping that next thursday things will work out. if not, do not be dismayed! there is a thumbs up thursday giveaway in the works.

so today my thumbs are up for kernel season's popcorn seasoning. i enjoy a bag of microwave popcorn. i like to munch on it after getting bug down for the night and while curled up watching tv with honey bear. it just tastes good - and i feel like maybe the popcorn isn't so bad for me.

in the grocery store the other day i happened upon this popcorn seasoning. it is available in a few flavors - white cheddar, kettle corn, garlic parmesan, nacho cheddar, i am sure some others. it was tempting and i succumbed! i decided to try out the nacho cheddar. and boy oh boy is it yummy! just pop your corn like usual - microwave or in a popcorn popper - and sprinkle the cheesy goodness (or whichever flavor you choose) over the corn.

i do refuse to look at the nutrition info on the back of the bottle. i don't want to know. i simply want to eat it. if i know what the label says i am afraid i won't be able to enjoy it as much. this very thing happened to me and a box of little debbie strawberry shortcake rolls. i was happily chomping away on said roll and decided to flip the box over and take a look at the nutrition facts - 240 CALORIES IN ONE ROLL!!!!! i haven't been able to eat one since. so now if i really really like something i can't make myself look at the label. ignorance is bliss.

anywho, back to popcorn. i plan to try out some of the other flavors soon. it is a little pricey, i think. $2.99 per bottle. but every time i sprinkle it on my popcorn i tell honey bear, "this stuff is worth all three dollars!" =)

do you have a favorite snack that deserves a thumbs up? share it with us!

wordless wednesday - hygiene

i live with a movie star

since bug was born i have wanted to get a video baby monitor. i like the idea of being able to roll over and take a peek at her without getting up and walking across the living room to open her door and startle her from a perfectly peaceful sleep. but, alas, a video monitor runs around a hundred buckaroos. so here we are nine months later and i have indeed startled a soundly sleeping baby with my need to make sure she was in fact sleeping.

until today!!! i was able to snag a summer infant video monitor for a mere...are you ready...$40!!! craigslist is my new best friend.

i immediately hooked the monitor up and adjusted the camera just perfectly over the crib. then it was time for bug to go to bed. usually i enjoy bedtime. we read, we sing, we pray and then i can spend some time with my honey bear, playing around on the internet, or catching up on some dvr. but tonight i spent the first 30 or so minutes watching bug on the monitor. i had to laugh at myself. i have made it to the part of the day that is mine and i choose to watch the baby on the monitor.

i couldn't help myself. we have had a simple sound only monitor and all this time it has been quiet aside from some ruffling of the sheet. now i see what is really going on in there. my bug is a wiggler! she was from one end of the crib to the other. it was quite a show! i really couldn't turn it off. and it was oh, so sweet when she finally just plopped her head down and fell asleep.

who needs tv when you can have a baby video monitor?! do you love your video monitor just as much?

not me!

is here already! where, oh where, does the time go? so join me and many others over at mckmama's blog to share those things that you didn't do this week.

so, anyone who knows me knows how serious i am about my housework. they know that i would not pick something up off the floor and toss it in the direction of behind the couch to keep the baby from putting it in her mouth. not me! i would immediately pull out the vacuum, of course.

i like well balanced meals and certainly did not have a bowl of cocoa pebbles for lunch...and dinner...not me!

i am so sure that there are plenty more not me's that i have done this past week but i cannot seem to think of any today! ;) be sure to go by mckmama's blog to link your not me's!

husbands do the darnedest things

there is one certain fleece blanket i always use when i cozy up on the couch. it usually just stays out on the couch unless company is coming and i fold it up and put it in the blanket basket. anyway, what i'm trying to say is my cozy fleece blanket is always on the couch.

so honey bear is spending some time with bug and is giving her a bottle while on the sofa. i am doing some cleaning up in the kitchen and i come around the corner just to see how things are going. it is then that i see honey bear wiping bug's milky little mouth on my snuggly fleece. "um, honey bear," i say, "the blanket if for snuggling. that is why we have a bajillion bibs and burp clothes." honey bear just as calm and cool as can be responded with,

"yea, you weren't supposed to see this."

what a hoot!!! i laughed heartily. he is such a dork. and i love him oh so very very much.

thumbs up thursday

i have been thinking about different topics to blog about. i don't want to always be serious and i don't always want to drivel on about what bug is doing every second. so i have come up with thumbs up thursday for now. i am going to use thursdays to tell you about things that i like, that i use around the house that make my days easier, that are must haves for buggie, or ideas and/or events and occasions that deserve a thumbs up. you get the idea - if it is something i like i will tell you about it on thursday. i think some giveaways will be grand and appropriate as well! and i want to hear from you, too! you can do a post on your own blog or you can simply leave your thumbs up in the comments section here.

so to christen thumbs up thursday i will tell you about something that has uncomplicated my mornings (or afternoons - whenever i get around to it). it is a hairstyle that is so simple and looks pretty cute, too. on long hair or short, the bang french braid is just oh so cute and, more importantly, oh so easy.


sure, you say, it looks good on her, she is jennifer aniston. i would bet a potato sack would look good on her. true, true. but i am not a betting woman. and if i was i would bet the bang french braid would look good on YOU, too! it takes only seconds, maybe a full minute, and you have a super cute look that can be dressed up for church or just right for playing with the little ones. i am trying to grow my hair out and this braid has been great for my in between bangs. give it a try and let me know if you do!

me sporting the bang french braid

is there anything you have discovered this week that deserves a thumbs up? is there anything you have known about for a while that deserves a thumbs up? let us know! you can write your own blog post about it or share it here in the comments section!

and just to give you a heads up (or a thumbs up), next thursday i plan to do a giveaway of my thumbs up recommendation!!!

wordless wednesday - french fry edition

pop!

i'll tell ya, i have been plagued by sinus yuck about 3 or 4 times already this season and i am t.i.r.e.d. of it! doesn't the day seem extra long when you can't breathe out of your nose? i think it does. last night i took some nyquil and boy did it ever work. when i woke up this morning i felt like i needed about 7 more hours of sleep. needless to say, that was not possible.

so i have been in my pjs all day long and i am not ashamed. i have spent just as much time laying on the floor as bug has playing on it. and that girl has been so good today. she took two great naps and has played quite happily. the evenings are always a bit more harried. i don't know what it is about 5 o'clock but she just gets cranky. the crankiness sets in right about the time honey bear gets home from work. he thinks it is him. i assure him it isn't.

bug is playing for a few more minutes right now and then off to bed. in my selfishness i try to keep a really sleepy little girl up until 9 when she is good and ready for bed by 8. i like the extra sleep in the morning.

i will leave you tonight with a picture that i think is too cute. bug always gets this funny look on her face when you put something on her head. it is so adorable that i don't think your lives could be complete without seeing it. =) see you tomorrow - assuming my head doesn't pop!

certainly not me!

i decided to join mckmama (and many others) today for...


you know, that time of the week when we can admit without admitting our shortcuts or shortcomings from the past week? after your stop here you should head on over to mckmama's blog and catch up on some others.

i totally didn't buy a box of hair color this weekend. there would be no need to do such a thing because i don't have one gray hair throughout my lovely dark locks. nope, not me!

when it comes to cleaning i would never take a shortcut and spray down the bathroom floor with windex and then wipe it up with paper towels on my feet just because it seemed like a lot more fun than mopping and i hate mopping.

i would never neglect my weekly menu planning and grocery shopping day after day so the only option at the last minute would be eating out. in this recession absolutely not me!

i never get overwhelmed with stay at home mommydom. so i simply couldn't have handed my screaming nine month old daughter to my husband with a declaration of "i quit!" that would be absurd, not me!

and i can't imagine not having my every day planned perfectly so that it would be unnecessary to put said nine month old in her exersaucer in front of nick jr so i can get my not me monday post typed up. never! not me!

looking forward to catching up on what you didn't do this past week!

thank goodness...

it is friday! though i have to admit that since i have been a mommy fridays don't really mean the same thing they used to. it used to mean a day off and sleeping in. now i don't even know what a day off is or how to sleep in. but this saturday nana has offered to keep bug for the day so i will say hello to my old friend day off and we will practice sleeping in - or at least napping.

bug's 9 month well check went...well! she is doing just marvelously. she weighed in at 19 lbs 12.5 oz and 27 inches long. and her head is in the whopping 75th percentile! just like her mama (i think i have mentioned my big head before). she had only one vaccination and didn't make a peep when the nurse stuck her. that is a first. we usually get quite the shrill scream when she gets her shots. the doctor did try to convince me of the positive effects of the flu shot - and i almost gave in - but in the end i stood strong and she didn't get one. our next check up is in 3 months...she will be a YEAR old!!! where has my itty bitty 5 pound baby gone?

my sister in love had us over for dinner tonight. that was a great treat. i love when someone else cooks and does the dishes. she made this oh so yummy baked potato casserole and i loved it so much that i wanted to link the recipe for all of you. this is definitely not a weight loss dish. but it is so good it makes your tongue want to beat your brains out! let me know if you try it.

emeril legasse's twice baked potato casserole

you will see me back around here on monday. i am working on a giveaway so be sure to stay tuned!

this post is linked at the grocery cart challenge recipe swap.

to vaccinate or not to vaccinate, that is the question

it is that time again - well baby check up time. bug goes in tomorrow for her 9 month well baby check and this eve of check up day is not unlike all the others. i dread it. i cry. i pray. i wonder if i am doing the right thing. we have had bug vaccinated on schedule up to this point, but every time she is due for her next dose i start to contemplate not doing it.

i have read soooo much on the topic of vaccines. the thing is i can be swayed either way. if i read something against vaccines i agree. if i read something promoting vaccines i agree. there is just so much stuff out there. we decided to vaccinate on schedule feeling the benefits outweigh the risks. but i will tell you, that girl is bathed in prayer the day before and day of her vaccinations.

we have decided that this month will be bug's last dose of on schedule vaccines. we will delay the mmr due at her 12 month check up. i am not sure how long we will delay it. maybe you know about delayed schedules and can offer some input. i do know that having the mmr in three separate vaccines seems to be recommended but our pediatrician does not offer this option. we will be forgoing the chicken pox vaccine all together unless bug doesn't contract chicken pox by the age of 10. at that time we will have her vaccinated.

oh, there will be no flu shot - swine or otherwise.

the medical responsibility of having a child feels like, possibly, the most overwhelming part of parenting. i want nothing but the absolute best for her and her body. i hate all of the conflicting information out there. i support all parent's decisions they make in regard to vaccinating. they all only want the best for their little ones.

what are your vaccination decisions? do you stress about it as much as i do?

wordless wednesday

gray hair is a blessing...

sorry i have been gone so long. it has been a busy few days with the death of my uncle and a trip to pennsylvania for the funeral. but i am back home now and trying to get back into the swing of things...ugh, the housework that awaits.

it has come to my attention this weekend that a serious infiltration of evil has made its way into my home and person. my lovely dark locks are being invaded by silver monsters! scary, wiry monsters. why does this gray hair cause me such stress? i am 27 years old. i feel 17. but i suppose the fact of the matter is i am indeed aging. blah!

i do find the silver hair shown here to be quite lovely...on her!

while i would like to grow old gracefully and fully embrace every single gray hair and line in my face, i am finding that a hard feat. i had this wild idea that i would remain 20 forever while the others around me grew older. since this does not seem to be the case i will for now simply enjoy still being in my twenties (if only for...ahem...3 more years) and will be heading out to buy a box of hair color this evening!!! and i will make this my new mantra:

gray hair is a blessing - ask a bald man.

what do i know?

my uncle is very near death. it may even be tonight. as an adult i haven't been extremely close to him. i do see him when i visit home and at holidays. but i remember him being around quite often as i was growing up. i remember trading cds with him and the pizza game he gave me and my sister for christmas one year. while i was in college he bought me a george forman grill - i think he may have been more excited about that than i was, he LOVES his steak!

with the news of his impending death i have been flooded with these memories and with the usual thoughts of death one ponders when it is thrust into their life. the strongest feeling i have is that death sucks. i can't make it sound any better because it isn't. and there is a reason for that,

for the wages of sin is death...romans 6:23a

we are sinners and we deserve nothing more than the grave and hell. what my uncle is facing we all must face because of adam's sin. and it would be just if that is where it ended. but the verse doesn't end here. what joy,

for the wages of sin is death BUT THE GIFT OF GOD IS ETERNAL LIFE THROUGH JESUS CHRIST OUR LORD. romans 6:23

we deserve death and hell, but God loves us so much he sent His only Son to DIE for us. i will never get over the fact that Jesus Christ has, too, suffered death. He knows just how much it sucks. and our Heavenly Father knows the pain of watching someone you love die. Jesus didn't only suffer the agony of a physical death but He also took the punishment meant for us in Hell. He paid the price of our sin so we don't have to. the hymn it is well with my soul has a glorious verse that goes like this,

my sin, oh the bliss of this glorious thought, my sin NOT IN PART BUT THE WHOLE, is nailed to the cross and i bear it no more PRAISE THE LORD it is well with my soul.

how can i ever get over this?! i simply can't. my sin has been covered by the blood. but the fact remains that we all must still suffer a physical death. it isn't meant to be pleasant but it doesn't have to fill us with fear. we will not be left in the grave. our Savior has conquered death and the grave,

o death, where is thy sting? o grave, where is thy victory? the sting of death is sin; and the strength of sin is the law.but thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. 1 corinthians 15:55-57

i am confident that my uncle knows the Savior of his soul. i am confident that when my uncle closes his eyes in death he will open them in Glory. we will all hurt and mourn when he goes, but we, too, will rejoice knowing that he is in the presence of the King. and i am sure my sweet grandma is waiting at the gate for his arrival!

I have a friend who just turned eighty-eight
and she just shared with me that she's afraid of dying.
I sit here years from her experience
and try to bring her comfort.
I try to bring her comfort
But what do I know? What do I know?
She grew up singing about the glory land,
and she would testify how Jesus changed her life.
It was easy to have faith when she was thirty-four,
but now her friends are dying, and death is at her door.
And what do I know? What do I know?

Well,I don't know that there are harps in heaven,
Or the process for earning your wings.
I don't know of bright lights at the ends of tunnels,
Or any of these things.

She lost her husband after sixty years,
and as he slipped away she still had things to say.
Death can be so inconvenient.
You try to live and love. It comes and interrupts.
And what do I know? What do I know?

Well,I don't know that there are harps in heaven,
Or the process for earning your wings.
And I don't know of bright lights at the ends of tunnels,
Or any of these things.

But I know to be absent from this body is to be present with the Lord,
and from what I know of him, that must be pretty good.
Oh, I know to be absent from this body is to be present with the Lord,
and from what I know of him, that must be very good.

-what do i know, sara groves